Being Single - Part 5

What do you think would make you happy?  Think about that in a male/female relationship.  If God sent this man or this woman that was perfect for you, would you be happy?  Would that person be enough?

From a fantasy of marriage perspective the answer to these questions would be yes.  But from a realistic perspective the answer is no.  In my marriage, if Nancy looked to me to complete her - to make her happy - I would fail.  There are times I do make her happy but not all the time.  I am human and make a lot of mistakes.  Sometimes I hit home runs and sometimes I strike out. (That is a baseball analogy.  For those outside the USA, how about this example from soccer: sometimes I score a goal and sometimes I do not.)

There was a time in out marriage that we both bought into this fantasy.  As time went on, it was killing us.  We were heading for disaster.  Finally, we got it.  A spouse is not designed to meet every need - that job is already taken by God.  Expecting Nancy to meet all my needs sets her up for failure.  So, think about this.  If i let God meet all the needs that He wants to meet in my life, then that allows Nancy to meet the needs He has designed her to meet in my life.  That works.  That is the way God designed it.

Question:  What are your expectations of a future spouse?

Dr. Kim