When Gratitude is Hard Ep. 705

Gratitude can feel effortless when life and marriage are smooth—but what about when it’s hard? In this episode, we explore how to practice honest gratitude even in seasons of struggle, disappointment, or unmet expectations. From grief and loss to conflict and emotional distance in marriage, we discuss ways couples can rebuild appreciation for each other, lean on God in difficult times, and use gratitude as a tool for hope, healing, and unity. Be encouraged to find thankfulness rooted in faith, not just feelings, even when your heart is hurting.


Main Takeaways:

Gratitude is challenging in seasons of struggle.

Honest gratitude is rooted in faith, not feelings.

Gratitude strengthens marriage and protects against division.

Spiritual rhythms help cultivate thankfulness.

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Quotes from this Episode:

Choosing gratitude when you don't feel it isn't fake—it's faith in action. Sometimes, obedience comes before emotion.

When disappointment builds, we keep a mental ledger of failures and let resentment choke out gratitude. 

Shifting your focus from what's wrong to what remains right isn't denial; it's a courageous act of faith, especially when you're hurting.

Gratitude flourishes when you intentionally move from deficit thinking to abundance thinking.

Don't compare your spouse to others—celebrate who they are and who they have become.

Feelings follow actions. Don't wait to feel grateful—do the grateful thing, and let your heart catch up.

Lament is honest, gratitude is hopeful. We need both, because lament without gratitude turns to bitterness, and gratitude without lament turns to denial.

Radical gratitude trusts in God's character, not in our circumstances.


Couples Conversation Guide:

  1. When life or our marriage feels hard, what makes it difficult for you to feel thankful? How can we support each other in those times?

  2. How can we remind each other to choose gratitude rooted in faith, even when our emotions don’t match our circumstances?

  3. Are there ways we’ve lost sight of what we appreciate about each other? What’s one thing we can start noticing and thanking each other for this week?

  4. What daily or weekly habits—like prayer, Scripture, or reflection—could help us keep gratitude alive, even when things are tough?


Mentioned in this Episode:

Kim KimberlingComment