"Traffic Signs and Your Marriage: DO NOT ENTER"

“Do Not Enter” signs make me want to enter.  I guess that is my rebellious side that sometimes pops up.  Yet, I know these signs are there for a reason.  For example, there could be something dangerous down that street or past the gate.  So I run a risk if I disobey the ‘do not enter’ sign.  Maybe someone posts that ‘do not enter’ sign because they want privacy.  They do not want anyone bothering them.  If they want to interact with someone they will initiate the interaction.  If I do not heed the sign, I am crossing a boundary that someone put in place.  I think there are ‘do not enter’ signs in marriage.  Let’s look at two. 

First, I am married to Nancy and have been since I was twenty-two.  ‘Do not enter’ signs need to surround my marriage.  There are places I do not need to go because they are dangerous for my marriage.  Flirting with another woman, looking at pornography, having a meal or coffee with a woman alone, and going to strip clubs are all ‘do not enters’ and there are many more.  The ones I listed are the ones I see guys go past all the time and they all lead to something that is very dangerous for your marriage.  The bottom line is just do not go there.  Violating the ‘do not enter’ sign will never get you to an Awesome Marriage.

The second ‘do not enter’ sign in marriage has to do with respecting your spouse.  Let me give you a couple of examples.  If you have been in an argument and your spouse needs time to think things through, give them the time.  If your spouse says “not tonight, how about tomorrow,” respect their request.  You get the idea.  Listen to your spouse and respect what they ask of you.  Do that for them and the odds are good that they will return the favor to you.

What are the ‘do not enter’ signs you need to obey and/or respect in your marriage?

Dr. Kim