Building a Foundation 6: Adversaries or Advocates?

Disagreement

Do you ever feel like your spouse is your adversary?  Do you feel like you are on separate teams fighting to win?  If you do, it is time to stop.  Your spouse should not be your enemy and you need to do whatever is necessary to turn this around.

Here are some steps to follow:

• Commit together to change this.

• Ask for forgiveness and forgive. By this time you both have done things that have contributed to the distance between you.

• Reframe your thinking. This person is your advocate not your adversary.

• Listen to each other and value what each says.

• When a disagreement happens, agree to call a “Time-Out” and then come back together to work on the problem together.

• Focus on how the problem needs to be solved - not on how you would solve the problem.

• Pray together that God would give you a “oneness” in your marriage.

Questions:

• What has kept you from being on the same “team” in your marriage?

• Will you commit to working on this issue together?

Dr. Kim