It’s no secret to any of us that we live in a sex-charged and sex-driven world. As men, we face sexual temptation every day. We are visual creatures and visual stimulation is always available. Pornography and sexually charged content are everywhere, screaming for our attention.
What happens in marriage when a husband’s eyes wander to pornography? How is a wife’s self esteem affected if she knows her husband is looking at another woman’s body instead of hers? What goes through a woman’s mind if she feels she is not enough for her husband sexually?
As a counselor, I have met with many couples affected by pornography. I know pornography has always been a problem for men but today it seems to have reached epidemic proportions. Porn is not harmless. It is not just a normal part of men’s lives. Pornography quite literally destroys marriages. The questions I posed above are real. I have heard them asked in one form or another by many wives. Porn breaks trust and disconnects couples. Some husbands and wives weather the storm and recover, but many do not.
Honestly, if a man told me that he had never, ever looked at pornography, I would have a hard time believing him. In one way or another, we have all been there. Some men have walked away from porn and never gone back. For many others, it has been - and still is - a constant struggle.
Now think about this. What if every man decided to eliminate porn from his life? What would that do for our wives? What would that do for our marriages? What would it do for us as men to be free from the darkness, shame and bondage that porn creates?
From the very beginning, God had a plan for the sexual relationship between a man and a woman. You don’t have to look farther than how perfectly he created our bodies to fit together! God is not a prude. The whole idea of sex was His. We have allowed the enemy to distort sex in our culture and in our marriages. We have fallen for his lies and deception. It’s time for all of that to stop. It’s time to embrace the plan for sex put in place by the One who knows us best. It’s time for men everywhere to stand together and say porn stops now. It stops with me; it stops with you. It stops! Join the #NOTME movement with us. Take the pledge and proudly say “not me.”
I will not dishonor my marriage with pornography.
I will not dishonor my wife by looking at pornography.
I will not devalue, objectify, or dishonor women in any way.
I will not dishonor my God and His incredible plan for marriage by looking at pornography.
With God’s help each day, I will not give in to the temptation of pornography.