If infidelity has not yet hit close to home for you, consider yourself lucky (or maybe you are a hermit?). I was thinking through a long list of people whom I know and love. Every single one of them has been touched by infidelity. It may be a friend, neighbor, or relative, but they have all felt the sting. They have all seen the hurt and pain, and many have experienced it close-up. It saddens me. As a counselor, I see the ripple effect. I witness kids hurt, lives torn apart, lies believed as truth, marriages derailed, and the list goes on and on. As the leader of Awesome Marriage, infidelity hits hard because it is the antithesis of everything I believe in for marriage. It is like kicking dirt in the face of God’s plan for marriage. It is the enemy who has lost the war winning way too many battles of this front. Infidelity is truly an epidemic in our culture today, but there is a cure.
First, Christians have to join the battle. That means we must fight to build strong, affair-proof marriages. The world needs to see something precious in our marriages. They need to see that building a strong marriage with God at the center pays real dividends. Somehow the statistic that less than 1 percent of affairs actually result in lasting marriages gets lost on people, or maybe people do not want to hear the truth. Whatever the reason, the statistic is still true. Over the past few years, I have talked to a number of people who thought they would be the exception, that this new person was their soul mate. So far all of those people and those relationships have struck out. Most never made it as far as the altar. The model of healthy, thriving marriages needs to be center stage.
Second, we need to learn to be bold with love. If you know someone in an affair or flirting with one, lovingly get in their face and ask them, “What do you think you are doing?” Then stay in their face until they stop or literally cast you aside. I cannot count the number of people who have told me that if someone had confronted them in the early stages of their affair, they think they would have stopped. Confrontation is a risk we need to take.
Third, pray. Pray for your marriage. Pray for others’ marriages. Pray that people would not be blind to the truth of the consequences of infidelity. Pray today and tomorrow and every day for the rest of your life. We are in a battle; and as Christians we need to act like it.