I recently talked to a couple that had considered marriage counseling for over five years. They said that things would get bad and then better and they just kept putting it off. They never really resolved issues. They just waited them out. Now in counseling we were dealing with five-plus-year-old issues with more frustration piled on top.
Don’t get me wrong. I was very excited that they finally were seeking help, but it would have been so much easier to work through things earlier. They knew they needed counseling. They knew it that day they called for an appointment and they knew it five years ago.
How do you know when you need marriage counseling? Let me give you some bullet points:
Do you keep fighting over the same things and never reach a resolution that works?
Have you stopped listening to each other?
Do you feel stuck in your marriage?
Do you feel you are on separate teams?
Do you feel disconnected at times?
Do you avoid each other?
Is your sex life suffering?
Is your marriage less than you hoped it would be?
That is not an exhaustive list, but if any of those fit you and your marriage, marriage counseling would probably be very beneficial. Now the question is where do you go? My bias is Christian counseling. When a couple comes to see me, they know that I will do everything I can to help them save their marriage and to build a marriage that thrives. They know I will help them put God first and each other second as we deal with their issues. They know I will pray with them and for them. When you are deciding on a counselor, don’t settle for anything less.
I know going to counseling is a big step for many of you, but remember taking that step could be the first step in turning your marriage around.